


found and unbound

by sirenofodysseus



Category: The Mentalist
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, H/C Bingo 2017, Prompt: Touch-Starved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-21
Updated: 2017-12-21
Packaged: 2019-02-17 21:22:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13085622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sirenofodysseus/pseuds/sirenofodysseus
Summary: Thomas McAllister, unlike everyone else, doesn’t let go. Written for H/C Bingo 2017, prompt: touch-starved.





	found and unbound

The first time she meets Red John, she’s dressed in white. He doesn’t call her _plain_ or _ugly_ or _repulsive_ – he merely smiles, takes her hand, and leads her away. She tells him her name is _Rebecca Anderson_ and he replies, still smiling, _I already know_.

 

Rebecca doesn’t question him; she squeezes his hand instead.

 

Thomas McAllister, unlike _everyone else,_ doesn’t let go.

 

 

::::

 

The first time he kisses her, six days after, Rebecca thinks _I’ll love him forever_. She imagines the melancholy sound of wedding bells, an ivory gown spun from delicate threads of silk, and a pavilion filled with the corpses of those who stole her childhood. Her husband, _Tom_ , wielding a blade which drips crimson onto the floor below.

 

She doesn’t tell him of her hope. Instead, she listens to him talk of a _better world_ ; _one_ , he tells her with a gruff smile, _filled with enlightenment, peace and most importantly, your happiness_.

Rebecca thinks she might cry, because while she can dream and hope, she still knows she’ll never be worthy of him. She thinks he deserves someone, who isn’t all twisted and demented inside. Who hasn’t been ruined or marred by the demons of society.

 

He doesn’t need her.

 

_Oh Rebecca_ , he tells her with a sad smile, _can’t you see your own worth? Can’t you see how beautiful you are?_

Her silence is his answer.

 

::::

 

 

Amongst the bloodshed and carnage, Rebecca still considers him a savior and a saint. She doesn’t see him how the media does— _a monster_ —but instead, she sees him as a friend to all.

 

She thinks if they knew the real him, they’d be praising him too.

 

Because for each throat he’s slit and for every life he’s taken, he’s also helped another find the light within the darkness.

 

_Without him,_ she thinks, _we’d be nothing_.

 

All of them, alone, are insignificant. Dumar Hardy. Craig O’Laughlin. Timothy Carter. Lorelei Martins. Herself, especially. Together, she knows however, they’ll change the world.

 

(And while she’ll never say it; she owes _him_ her life and her loyalty for finding others, who are just as fucked up as she is.)

 

::::

 

After Patrick Jane kills Dumar Hardy to protect Teresa Lisbon, Thomas takes her to bed.

 

It’s not her first time.

 

No, her first time was while she’s dressed in flannel. Her bedroom was dark and her father had stroked her hair gently.

 

_“Show Daddy how much you love him, baby.”_

_“I can’t, Daddy! It hurts…!”_

He had yanked her hair. _“Don’t you_ want _Daddy’s love, Becca? Don’t you want to make Daddy happy?”_

She had been six-years-old.

 

The memory brings tears and in turn, he takes her hands in-between his own. His fingers are calloused. His hands are warm.

 

_It’s okay_ , he tells her – and for the first time in a long while, she actually believes it.

 

So instead of pulling back, she presses her lips to his and hears him ask _are you sure?_ softly.

She nods. She’s never been so sure about anything before.

 

::::

 

Patrick tells her, after she’s killed Agents Dyson and Martinez and attempted to kill Agent Bosco, she’ll wake up one day – horrified at what she’s done.

 

_The joke is on you_ , she thinks with a soured smile, because; _I love Red John and he loves me_.

 

_One day_ , he tells her.

 

She doubts it.

 

After all, she’d do _anything_ for the man, who promised he’d never let anyone hurt her again.

 

Even if that meant rotting in prison for the rest of her life in the name of _Red John_.


End file.
